178) NEW HORROR RELEASES - The Exorcist: Believer (2023)

I'm not quoting this movie!

Director
David Gordon Green

Cast

Leslie Odom Jr. - Victor Fielding
Lidya Jewett - Angela Fielding
Olivia O’Neill - Katherine West
Jennifer Nettles - Miranda West
Norbert Leo Butz - Tony West
Ellen Burstyn - Chris MacNeil
Raphael Sbarge - Pastor Don Revans
Okwui Okpokwasili - Dr. Beehibe
Danny McCarthy - Stuart

E. J. Bonilla - Father Maddox

*Spoilers ahead*

Congratulations "Exorcist II: The Heretic!" You're no longer the worst movie in "The Exorcist" franchise. Oh, you're still a laughably terrible movie that shouldn't exist. That'll never change. But this new movie, "The Exorcist: Believer" has taken your dented crown as the worst of the bunch.  

Now, I normally don't like to quote another movie critic when writing my own review, but at the end of this movie, the words of Roger Ebert in reference to the 1994 movie "North" came to mind.
"I hated this movie. Hated, hated, hated, hated, hated this movie. Hated it. Hated every simpering stupid vacant audience-insulting moment of it. Hated the sensibility that thought anyone would like it. Hated the implied insult to the audience by its belief that anyone would be entertained by it," he wrote. 

I certainly don't want to use his words to express my own thoughts about a particular movie. But in this case, it just fits so well. 

I'll certainly try to top that sentiment with my own words in regard to "The Exorcist: Believer."  

The 1977 movie "Exorcist II: The Heretic," a direct sequel to the 1973 movie "The Exorcist," is considered one of the worst movie sequels, and one of the worst horror movies in general, ever made. It almost sets a standard for bad horror movies. 

It certainly is...or was...the worst movie in the Exorcist series. Now, Hollywood has managed to vomit forth another flick for the franchise that's worse than part two. And it really is worse!

I hated this new movie. It's frustrating, lazy, uninteresting, banal, out-of-touch, and beyond stupid! I've seen dingy bath water leave a better film. 

The Plot

The story starts off in Haiti where photographer Victor Fielding (Leslie Odom Jr.) and his pregnant wife Sorenne (Tracey Graves) are honeymooning. 

During their trip. Sorenne has a voodoo priestess give a "blessing of protection" on her baby, Angela. 

Shortly afterwards, a massive earthquake hits Haiti. 

While Sorenne dies from injuries she sustained during the quake, their baby is able to be saved. Victor was forced to choose between his wife or his daughter. 

The story shifts to thirteen years later as Victor lives with his teenage daughter in Georgia. The loss of his wife shattered Victor's faith in God. 

Though she never met her mother, Angela thinks about her often. 

She and her friend Katherine (Olivia O’Neill), whose family is Baptist, venture into the woods after school one afternoon to hold a séance in an attempt for Angela to contact her deceased mother.

Both girls go missing for three days until they're found in some stranger's barn. 

Their conditions worsen over the days, and their behavior becomes stranger and more violent. 

Lidya Jewett and Olivia O’Neill in "The Exorcist: Believer."

Both families put the girls into the hospital, which doesn't help. 

Katherine's mother, Miranda (Jennifer Nettles), is convinced her daughter has become possessed by a demon as a result of whatever ritual she performed out in the woods. 

Victor isn't so convinced about his own daughter. Still, he doesn't know what her problem is. 

A nurse and former nun, Ann (Ann Dowd), gets involved and tries to convince Victor that Angela is also possessed by a demon. 

Ann had previously entered a Catholic novitiate to become a nun, but ended up becoming pregnant. On top of that, she ended up aborting her unborn baby in an attempt to make her life better, I guess. 

To help convince Victor, Ann gives him a memoir written by Chris MacNeil (Ellen Burstyn) whose daughter, Regan (Linda Blair) was possessed by a demon when she was a young girl back in 1973. As seen in the first movie, Regan undergoes a Catholic exorcism which saves her.

Chris tells Victor she's knowledgeable in the field of exorcism, but she's not an exorcist.

First, Chris sees Angela in the hospital before heading to Katherine's home to visit with the girl.

Chris tries to perform some kind of "deliverance ritual" to drive out the demon from Katherine in the name of "Jesus and her daughter, Regan." As expected, it doesn't go well at all for Chris.
So, Victor, Miranda, Ann, and Katherine’s father Tony (Norbert Leo Butz) reach out to Fr. Maddox (E. J. Bonilla) to conduct an exorcism. Fr. Maddox must first get permission from his Bishop. 

Meanwhile, they also ask Miranda and Tony's family pastor, Stuart (Danny McCarthy), a Pentecostal preacher, Don Revans (Raphael Sbarge), and a spiritual healer, Dr. Beehibe (Okwui Okpokwasili) to assist in an exorcism. 

Unfortunately, the diocese won't grant Fr. Maddox permission to perform an exorcism under the reason that doing so would be "dangerous for him and for the Church." 

As this crew of miscellaneous people beg the priest to participate, he agrees in spite of the diocese's instructions. 

But his involvement is short lived. 

This crew clearly has no idea what they're doing. They just use holy objects like a crucifix and holy water at random, while reading from the Bible and the Catholic Roman Ritual of Exorcism with hopes that'll all work.

The demon, meanwhile, tells Victor he must choose which girl lives and which one dies. And to add insult to injury, the girl who dies will be dragged to Hell. 

My thoughts

It seems too many movies nowadays are seldom made to tell an entertaining story or for any artistic credibility. Most current movies like this one are made for political credibility, and to dump all over the past. 

To begin with, the movie isn't scary. I mean that sincerely. I wasn't scared nor even a little intrigued about what was happening. I'm not stating that to spite the movie. It just wasn't scary. 

The entire experience is remarkably underwhelming for a film with the word "Exorcist" in the title. At least "Exorcist II" was interesting enough to make me wonder what the hell I was watching.  

But my real gripe about this poor excuse for a horror flick and sequel to a great horror movie is the screwed-up message it throws up. 

This movie has absolutely no respect whatsoever for the source material. It stomps all over the original novel by William Peter Blatty, the original 1973 movie directed by William Friedkin, and the Catholic teachings about exorcism which is the foundation for the original story. 

It trashes everything that made this sequel possible, and everything that makes the source material good and thought provoking. 

The very beginning of the movie in Haiti starts out well, with the parents involving themselves in voodoo rituals. That never, never leads to anything good. The ritual leads the audience think this is what'll open the door to the demonic possession later in the movie.

Once the mother states her belief that this voodoo blessing is "the most beautiful blessing of protection for Angela," that's when the movie lost me and went downhill. I say that because this plays into the happy ending for Angela. 

By the end of the movie, I seriously doubted the movie producer's understanding of Catholicism, exorcism, voodoo rituals, Christianity and religion in general, and the nature of demonic activity. Did they so much as bother to at least read the Wikipedia page about these topics? Or did they rely on what little information (if any) they may have heard here and there over the years? 

Despite whatever problems Christians, Catholic or otherwise, may have with the movie "The Exorcist" and its depictions, one thing is certain. The story involves two Roman Catholic priests who believe in Jesus Christ, and stand in for Jesus Christ as they use the power of Jesus Christ to conquer the devil in order to save a young girl. 

Leslie Odom Jr., as Victor and Ellen Burstyn who 
reprises her role as Chris MacNeil.

With this new movie, the writers go completely out of their own way, practically stumbling over their own screwed up "logic," to insist that conquering the devil is not merely a Catholic nor Christian thing. 

Stand-up comedian and Catholic, Jen Fulwiler, said it best in one of her routines. 

"Try to imagine an exorcist movie without the Catholic Church. It would be like 'We've been hearing evil voices from the basement. It's a demon! Quick, somebody call a non-denominational worship leader'," she jokes.

Yeah! No, that's not going to happen. 

I hate to sound preachy, but this is a story with a Catholic foundation. And I'm a practicing Catholic. So, there's a lot in this movie I can't ignore. 

Catholicism professes belief in one God, the Father Almighty, and in Jesus Christ who is God's only son, and our Lord. The Rite of Exorcism is a Catholic ritual as Christ instructed His apostles to cast out demons in His name. And that continues to this day.  

If Christ gave His Catholic Church the power to cast out demons in His name, and if He is the Son of God, who tells us He is "the way, the truth, and the life" then non-Christian religions simply don't have the power to do that no matter how fuzzy and warm the idea of unity among all religions make the writers feel. The first movie got that correct as Christ defeats the devil through the two priests who performed the exorcism over the possessed girl. "The power of Christ compels you," they recite over and over again, over Regan in part one. 

In this new segment, the devil kills the one priest involved and ends up victorious over God. 

They save one of the girls not by invoking God, but by invoking her love for her deceased mother. They do this by using one of her mother's scarves to incite that love she has. It has pagan ancestral ritual written all over it. 

Meanwhile, the devil is practically permitted to kill the other girl and drag her to hell with no chance of forgiveness through Christ's redemption, which was the demon's ultimate goal. Typical of misguided and out-of-touch Hollywood!  

In the scene where Chris MacNeil tries to exorcise the demon by herself, she expresses bitterness towards to the Church for not witnessing the actual exorcism of her daughter because, as she puts it, "I'm not a member of the damn patriarchy." Few words summarize modern society better than the word "ungrateful." 

When she tries to expel the demon, it doesn't go particularly well for her which didn't surprise me. Again, Chris initially claims she's not an exorcist. Anyways, que the complete disrespect for the source material. 

In the original movie, Chris MacNeil seeks help for a problem that no one can help her with - the demonic possession of her young daughter. 

So, as a last resort, she turns to an institution, the Catholic Church, which she otherwise has no involvement in or understanding of. Regardless, she puts her trust in this institution which offers her help that no one else can offer. 

The Church sends Fr. Merrin (Max von Sydow) and Fr. Karras (Jason Miller) who save her daughter when no one else could, even at the cost of their lives.

Now, this new movie gives its source material the woke middle finger and blames "the patriarchy" for not allowing Chris in the same room as the priests go up against the powers of hell to drive the demon out of her daughter. Did she forget about the instances before the exorcism where she was in Regan's room and ended up physically beaten up and shocked at the sight of what her possessed daughter was doing and saying? 

The writers have Chris criticize the Church and the men who died saving her daughter, all while negating the power of the Church and of Jesus Christ which is how these priests saved her daughter in the first place. The movie claims that, well, anyone can expel demons. The Church is nothing special. 

It's no surprise that the one Catholic priest in "The Exorcist: Believer" is portrayed as an incompetent, weak man per usual Hollywood standards. 

When he goes to his Bishop and local authorities to seek permission to perform an exorcism, he's told it's too dangerous for him and for the Church. 

If the writers had a spec of knowledge and understanding about how things operate in the Church, they'd know Christ instructed the Church to cast out demons in His name. That hasn't changed just because it's 2023. 

Exorcisms are routinely performed in various rituals in the church. At Baptism, the priest recites three prayers of exorcism over the person being baptized. 

And "exorcist" is one of the minor orders of a priest before he's ordained. 

Every diocese has an exorcist. Exorcisms are still performed! Our fight against Hell is a major reason the Catholic Church continues to exist!

So, why is it dangerous for the Church to perform an exorcism right now, as the Bishop in the story claims? It shows how lazy and misguided the writing behind this movie is.  

And I just cannot believe that a woman (Ann the nurse and former nun) who was pious enough to enter a novitiate in order to be a nun, only to become pregnant, would then kill her unborn baby. C'mon! What Catholic, devout enough to pursue the religious life as a sister but unfortunately succumbed to temptation and became pregnant as a result (It happens - we're all fallen creatures) would then quickly turn to killing her unborn baby in order to "make things right?" How unbelievably unrealistic and just plain ignorant! Then this same weirdo ex-nun suddenly has power over the demon possessing these girls. Oh, please! 

Never underestimate Hollywood's ability to outdo itself in producing movies worse than the crap produced before.

Director David Gordon Green wrote and directed the last three "Halloween" movies which are a trio of disappointment. So, I'm not surprised his involvement in "The Exorcist" series is also a disappointment. 

Evidently, "The Exorcist: Believer" is supposed to be the first in a three part series, with the next movie to be called "Exorcist: Deceiver." I can't say I'm looking forward to it. 

According to a Hollywood Reporter article, Green expressed doubt about participating in that next movie based on the results of this nonsense. Please, don't get involved! Just walk away.  

"Exorcist II: The Heretic" is bad because it lacks consistency, confuses audiences, and is weird in the worst way possible thanks to its lazy writing. 

It deviates far from part one into some trippy psychological storyline. It tries to be its own separate experience from the first movie. But to its credit, though, "Exorcist II: The Heretic" doesn't have some modern political ideology it tries to beat audiences over the head with. This new movie does precisely that. And it still gets the source material wrong all while trying to subtly apologize for the first movie.   

The writers want us to think that political ideologies like religious equality and positive vibes, man, is what drives the devil away. It's a notion based on absolutely nothing.

These dumbasses in the movie have no idea what they're up against. But it doesn't matter because they "believe." Hence, the title. It's immensely frustrating to watch. 

"The Exorcist: Believer" is another attempt by Hollywood to take a classic franchise and make it a socio-political device with a story based on meaningless platitudes and weak flaky ideas that might sound good on a bumper sticker. 

It wags its finger about "the terrible patriarchy" while preaching "all religions are equal." 

All religions can't be equal because they all make different claims. Either Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life as He claimed, or He's not. And the Catholic Church is the church He founded, or it's not. Someone's belief doesn't negate nor make something true. 

With this movie, the message is a sugary saccharin sweet nonsensical one about the goodness behind being good because good people are good, and goodness makes us feel good because any god (who cares which one) is good for wanting us to feel good... and that's good! 

Hollywood's perception of Catholicism, and of most religions generally speaking, is insanely erroneous and meaningless. 

The characters in this movie toss around holy buzz words like "believe" and "faith" and "goodness" as though that's enough for these Hollywood hack writers to sound like they know what their talking about. It's insulting to audiences. 

This whole mess ends with a meaningless boring speech from this useless ex-nun about people's hopes, dreams, pursuits, and desires to be happy, while the devil just wants us to give up and be unhappy. 

And that all "God...any god, or any good person" wants from us is to just keep going and be happy. The word "banal" is not a big enough word. Now I feel like throwing up!

This movie is a limp and useless waste of time. It's an insult to rational audiences, Catholic and non-Catholic alike. I'm simply grateful I chose not to see this movie in a theater, and waste money on the price of admission.

"The Exorcist: Believer" is arrogant anti-Catholic nonsense with absolutely nothing to support it other than bitterness and maybe some daddy issues.  

If nobody has done so yet, I wish to apologize to the late William Peter Blatty and the late William Friedkin for this detestable stain of a film that's unfortunately now permanently attached to their intellectual property. 

Check out my review of "The Exorcist III" - a far better sequel!